Changing Tides

Anxiety always creeps in just in time for the unknown but I think, that it is pretty common. It’s the unsettled feeling in the pits of your stomach you can’t quite explain. Do I just have to go to the loo? I’m actually really nervous? Or am I hungry?

Can’t explain it but in reality, you know exactly why you’re feeling this way.

I’ve had this feeling, the unsettling wormhole in my stomach for a good portion of the past 3 months. And I certainly know why.

I’ve decided to take a chance and jump into the unknown. My unknown.

It may not be unknown for many but it is for me. Move to a new country and live there. This first part isn’t new to me, I’ve done this before, I can say I’m experienced BUT it was with my family. Uh-uh! Here’s the kicker, I’m moving alone. All the way, literally, to the other side of the globe AND to the northern hemisphere. That’s different, I’ve lived on the equator, had fresh coffee cherries in our front yard and on the southern hemisphere, where it’s summer during Christmas and that’s for the most part of my life. Going north? That’s new.

I believe, I have played it safe for some time and it’s about time to set things into motion, I’ve taken the “traditional” and “normal” path of life for a quarter of a century now and I’ve never felt it was who I was. Not saying that I didn’t uncover what I wanted to do in life, what I am passionate or what I value the most in life about but well it’s time for something new. Test these passions, values and beliefs.

Normal. What is that? I don’t do “normal” and I definitely don’t do “traditional”. Most of the time I’ve been called weird and even nutty, friends, family and sometimes even strangers alike. So here I am moving to this direction, embracing that “non-conforming” self of mine and taking a dip into my unknown, courageously but oh man, oh man, I am scared shitless. Really!

There’s only so much time and it’s true what adults back in the day have told me when I was not so much taller than I am now and I know many of us have also have heard many times before, that time flies.

Flying out soon enough.

Anxious, excited and honest.

A.

 

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